Misty mornings, polychromatic scenery and brisk winds are ideal settings to contemplate the year before the holiday frenzy.
The post-October realization that we are but weeks away from another Christmas season comes with a strong sense of foreboding for me. Weeks away from people convincing themselves that they ought to be cheery, with a forced smile on their faces. Weeks away from the consumer madness. Weeks away from familial guilt. Weeks from everyone being obsessed with false ideologies.
My family life is confusing and disjointed, with more demands upon me than I can meet. They are lax and understand I can afford little, but it pains me to see them feel that they have to spend outside of their means for the sake of “the perfect holiday.”
Anyway, what I prefer to contemplate during the month of November is the year in retrospect. What was my favorite book? What did I learn? In school, what was my favorite class? What relationships did I do the best with, and which ones not so much?
This is also the time I like to spend contemplating and preparing for the new year, as the five days between it and Christmas are surely insufficient. What successes can I carry with me? What can I do now so that my new year is less overwhelming and shocking? Should I throw a party?
I apologize for my overt distaste for Christmas, but it does get my anxieties ticking off the charts, so I find it important to remind myself to not get so caught up and find time for reflection and maintaining a workable pace as the year enters its final act.
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