Fairy tales, finely-woven fantasies of inspiration and wonder, have been told as bedtime tales to children as a means of delightful entertainment.
Three of the most famous fairy tales are “Cinderella,” “Snow White” and “Sleeping Beauty;” all enchanting tales that centralize their plots around a damsel in distress, a helpless lady who needs to reach fulfillment through the daring rescue of a prince.
This has been the commonplace interpretation of fairy tales for as long as such fantasies have endured, although with the rapid modernization of thought and storytelling, new interpretations have been offered as supplements, even replacements, to this standard conception.
Fairy tales are also routinely offering up false realities about social standards of courtship and behavioral practices for women and men alike.
In a compelling essay by Louise Bernikow, “Cinderella : Saturday Afternoon at the Movies,” Bernikow focuses on the influence of certain fairy tales, notably Cinderella, on the formation of certain gender-specific roles in adolescent girls.
Bernikow analyzes the behavior of women in fairy tales, paralleling these behaviors to those of modern women.
Despite the modernization of courtship and relationship standards, I have many friends who still pine for their “Prince Charming” to come and sweep them off their feet. Personally, to be frank, I feel the “Prince Charming” myth is a load of bull.
I don’t need to be “rescued” and I’m certainly not going to sit around moping because nobody has “found” me yet. Relationships are not a game of hide and seek.
Bernikow writes about this notion of the “Prince Charming” when she says, “Someday my Prince will come. Women will not save her; they will thwart her.”
This is an expression of the belief that only men can save women. Other women cannot be of any aid to her, in this life.
This automatically removes the growing gay community from the picture. What if one woman is simply looking for her “Princess Charming”? Bernikow, like myself, asks: Why can’t a woman’s social network of female friends and family be her saving grace?
Bernikow identifies another point that I only realized when reading her article. That is fairy tales identify men as unreachable and powerful, distant bodies of knowledge holding wisdom unbeknownst to women. Painting women as being incapable of holding any form of tangible knowledge.
Bernikow then delves into the historical roots of the story by bringing up parallels of archetypal fairy tale behavior from the past. Bernikow discusses the idea of witchcraft, “ancient female magic,” the witch being a woman who possessed power, “opposition to the world of the King ” She had to be controlled.”
This expresses the idea that historically men have been on a constant crusade to keep women in their control. As if women of power are to be viewed as wild individuals with no restraint.
These ideas promote notions that women with power may not be able to control themselves or to the handle the responsibility bestowed upon them, which to me is a ridiculous notion.
Cinderella and other “damsel in distress” fairy tales are creating false ideas about romantic relationships, friendships and gender roles into the psyches of adolescent girls. This concept that women need to be saved, need to be rescued by a prince and absolutely need a man to be complete is, in my opinion, one of the greatest fallacies of the human race.
Unfortunately, it’s a circular argument, because there is some truth in the idea that women are constantly “being awful to each other,” not to mention women are “preoccupied with the way they look. They are obsessed with their mirrors, straining to see what men would see.”
I could carry on for days about the destructive nature of fairy tales, but when it was all over I still feel like a hypocrite because I personally practice the unnecessary ritual of spending hours in front of the mirror trying to primp and mask myself for the world outside.
With all things considered, though, when we examine fairy tales, what are our daughters truly learning?
Ally writes about mental health every Friday.