I asked a bunch of my friends if their parents used to make them eat dinner before they’d go trick-or-treating, and they were all like, “No.” I got gypped; my parents always made me eat dinner. It was like they were taunting me. “Aww, come on mom, dinner is going to spoil my appetite.”
You’d get out, and there would always be that one house where the people weren’t home, but they would set out a bowl of candy with a note that would say, “Please take one,” and by the time you got there, the candy was always gone.
And what about class on “beggar’s night” – you could never concentrate. There’d always be that one kid when you got to like fifth grade who would act all high and mighty, “I don’t trick-or- treat anymore,” like they were too mature for it. I hope that kid is having fun at Columbus State.
One year, I went as Raphael from the Ninja Turtles, and his weapons were these sais (they look like forks), but we couldn’t find anything like that, so my grandmother got me this plastic pitch fork to carry around. If only I had been witty back then; when neighbors asked me what I was supposed to be I would have said, “I’m the devil – in turtle form.”
I always remember seeing a couple with a newborn baby trick-or-treating too. Everyone knew it was a front, though. “They’re not getting that candy for the kid. He doesn’t even have teeth.” And the babies on Halloween always, always had the exact same costume – a jack-o- lantern.
It seemed like the older you got the less creative your costume got too. Because it wasn’t about the costume, it was about the candy. I remember my last couple times trick-or-treating (so ‘ya know, like last year); my friends and I were very business-like. One year, I went as a football player, wearing an Ohio State jersey. Well, that wasn’t all I wore – it’s not like I was Donald Duckin’ it, I had pants on too.
So you would be out trick or treating, and if one single thing went wrong (such as your mom making you take a younger sibling who was going to slow you down) you just flipped out. And there would always be that straggler who’d knock on your door at like 9:30, and you’d think, “Man, I should still be out there.”
For the third straight year, Josh will be again dressing up as Barry Manilow for Halloween. E-mail him ideas for next year at [email protected].