Hurray for Hollywood! Susan Sarandon, Tim Robbins, Martin Sheen, Steven Spielberg and all of these hard-core Bush haters sure had an impact on the election.
Bush had more votes than anyone in American history despite the fact that Michael Moore goes out and makes a movie of propaganda against him. Bruce Springsteen tours the country raising money for John Kerry, and even though Kerry had the always highly-coveted endorsement from the Toledo Blade, the man still loses. I would now like to take the time to faultlessly and, I must humbly say, brilliantly go over so many of the lies that we had to have shoved down our throats, and that many of us hold near and dear to our hearts still.
Some people have said that the entire reason for going into Iraq was that Bush wanted to avenge an assassination plot against his father. What is this, Hamlet?
FACT: there was never even an attempt on the man’#39;s life. There was a group of people in Iraq who had an assassination plot against George Bush who were arrested before anything ever happened.
Let’#39;s look at this logically. If you believe the war is because of that, it would mean Bush sent thousands of troops into Iraq because some people had a botched plan 10 years ago to assassinate his father. Do you honestly believe he would do that? Of course not, because anyone who thinks that way wouldn’#39;t be reading my column. They would be reading things like Morning Star and The Socialist News.
Adds tried to imply that Bush was like the CEO of Enron. The only connection that he has to Enron is that they were brought down during his first term. Well, that and the fact that he and Enron are both from Texas, but that doesn’#39;t mean anything. My ancestry goes back to Germany, but that doesn’#39;t mean I know Hitler.
People were led to believe from anti-Bush ads and liberal rhetoric (a.k.a. lies) that there was going to be a draft. The bill was then proposed by two democrats and voted down 402-2; Which was ironically enough the same margin that I beat Matt Sussman by when we competed against each other in that swimsuit contest. Obviously that was a joke. He never had those two votes.
Back to the election, though. I always hear these people, ‘Well I just think Bush is soooo dumb.’ Hello! The man has degrees from Harvard and Yale, and we’#39;re all at Bowling Green. No offense to Bowling Green. All I’#39;m saying is that it’#39;s no Harvard or Yale, and don’#39;t say the only reason he got into those schools was because of who his dad is. He went to college 20 years before his dad became president.
You have all of these people who think of Michael Moore like he’#39;s a god, but he’#39;s not (First of all because Mt. Olympus isn’#39;t that strong). Moore is so far to the left that Karl Marx told him to settle down. Moore isn’#39;t a mainstream Democart in the same way that Jerry Falwell isn’#39;t a mainstream Republican. And I believe that Moore might have done more harm that good for Kerry because the only people who saw his ‘documentary’ were those who are as wacky as he is (no offense if that’#39;s you, I love ya just the same).
So many actors came out for John Kerry. I don’#39;t know if I’#39;ll ever be able to look at Ben Affleck the same. Think of all of the great movies that he’#39;s made over the past few years: Gigli, Daredevil, Paycheck. When I see him in films now though, all I can think of is his wacko ideas. I mean, he’#39;s today’#39;s Jimmy Stewart. All right, he’#39;s today’#39;s Joseph Cotton. Who’#39;s Joseph Cotton? Exactly.
Robert Redford said that if Bush were re-elected he would move to Ireland. Bush was, yet Redford remains. And people say the president is a liar.
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Josh may look good in a swimsuit, but don’#39;t let that stop you from e-mailing him at [email protected].