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Prom Night’ horrors create horrible re-make

You have heard of films like “Halloween” and “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre.” These are merely two of the classic films that have been made into the less inspiring, but inevitable remakes of today. Did you know that the hockey masked killer named Jason from “Friday the 13th” will be joining the ranks soon as well? Better yet, do you remember the one called “Prom Night”?

Like its 1980s copy, 2008’s “Prom Night” begins like any other teenage horror film. We are introduced to our attractive, but innocent main character named Donna (Brittany Snow) and her promiscuous group of friends. We already know the inevitable is chaos, but this time the scenario for terror is the young girls’ senior Prom night. As we guessed, Donna is about to come face to face with a nightmare on what should be the night of her dreams.

If unfolding the plot of a story was a game between the audience and the film, the audience would have had the upper hand over “Prom Night” from scene one. Instead of involving the audience with the development of the plot, the filmmakers spoon-feed the entire list of clues within the first five minutes. Therefore, we immediately know that the man who just recently escaped from prison is the same man who murdered Donna’s family three years ago because of a twisted sexual obsession he has with her. Now, with a name, a motive, and even a face, our would be slasher is only a pathetic excuse for even the worst of cinema’s boogeymen.

Most terrible horror films can at least garner a bit of humor out of their dumbfounded characters and insipid plot schemes. With so little left to the imagination, “Prom Night” isn’t even worth enduring such a short-lived runtime. When an audience already knows every move a film can make, each repeat step becomes an eye-rolling bore.

The PG-13 rating of “Prom Night” was reached with the help of bland characters and watered-down horror film conventions. Even with a target audience of unknowing preteen girls, no filmmaker should ever be given the right to safeguard their moneymaking scheme because of an assumed audience stupidity. By doing so, they simply took the story of an already forgotten film and made it something even more worthless.

Zero stars out of four

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