I opened the November 2 edition of The BG News and, as expected, found a number of letters bombarding the writers of the “slutty costume” opinion pieces.
Sure enough, women across campus were upset with the ideas that what a woman wears makes her responsible for domestic violence and that what you wear determines the level of respect you are given.
I certainly do not contest the first point. If a woman is physically or sexually abused, regardless of the circumstances, she is the victim. I do, however, take issue with the idea that clothing does not equate to respect.
Do people have the right to wear whatever they want? Yes, of course. Does this mean they should be carefree in regards to their dress? No. What you wear goes hand-in-hand with what people will think of you. If you show up to a job interview wearing sweatpants and a dirty shirt, odds are you will not be afforded very much respect.
While I believe appearance should not factor in to how a person is regarded, it is impossible to deny that it does; that’s just the way of the world.
If a woman dresses to show off her body on a regular basis, most men I know probably will not treat her with as high a level of respect. Are they going to have irresistible desires to rape her?
No, of course not, that would be absurd. But they probably will have a low first impression.
What I think was lost in yesterday’s argument is a man’s opinion. If a woman thinks that the only way she can get a man to pay attention to her is by showing off as much skin as possible, she is doing two people a great disservice.
Herself, for having such a low opinion of her own worth, and the guy, for minimalizing him down to a single sexual idea.
See, men are not all highly sexualized beings who think with their genitalia. We have brains, and we are capable of using them.
We are able to form our opinions by getting to know members of the opposite gender. We don’t all think only of “getting busy.”
Most of us just want a girl with whom we can relate, with whom we can talk, and with whom we can just have a fun time. If we think a girl is nothing more than a sex-loving “floozy,” we probably won’t be interested in a relationship.
Again, it comes down to how you dress. If you dress to have people look at you, they will look at you… And probably not do much more.
If you actually present yourself as a regular human being, the respect given will most likely be at a level more deserved.
Send comments to Dan Carr at [email protected].
