A few weeks ago, I covered the International Dinner for The BG News. At one point, I was talking to one of our photographers and he asked me if there were certain photos of the event that needed taken. I started talking about wanting as many of the photos from the fashion show that took place at the end of the event as possible. Halfway through my mini-spiel about what I wanted I stopped and apologized, saying I sounded bossy and that I didn’t want to come off that way.
At the time, my rationale was that I have no clue how to take decent photos, especially when there’s some bad lighting. But, if I’m being completely honest with myself, I didn’t want to come off as sounding too bossy because that’s not how I want to present myself.
Which really got me thinking about why it’s a bad thing to call someone bossy, which led me to wonder why it’s considered a bad thing for women to take control of a situation and let others know what they want.
One of the biggest culprits, of course, is society. It’s traditionally accepted that men are able to take charge in a situation and tell people what they want, they’re applauded for it. But when women try to take control of a situation in the same manner as men would, they’re criticized and told that they’re power-hungry.
So, this week, I’m going to do a little social experiment. I’m going to be more assertive when I’m talking to people. This is something that’s totally different for me because I try to be a people pleaser and usually only tell people what they want to hear. But I’m also looking forward to doing it and to see what people say about my change in personality for the week.
Since it’s almost the end of 2016, I looked back at some of my goals for the year and realized that I let myself down in one way. I told myself I was going to tell more people “no” if there was something I really didn’t want to do. At the start of the year, I was doing just fine at telling people. But then I started to get complacent and started to slip back to my old ways of being a “yes girl.”
I’m going to work on that for the week as part of being more assertive.
Who knows, if it goes well for me, maybe I’ll try and incorporate it into my life more often and make it a permanent part of who I am.
I’m also going to hold my ground when I’m walking around campus. When I’m walking around, either to different classes or to get food, I’m not going to move out of the way of anyone, regardless of who the person is, if they’re walking in the opposite direction but are still in my path.
I encourage anyone else who wants to challenge themselves to do it as well.
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