Have you noticed Bowling Green doesn’t just represent another small Ohio community, it is more like the land of Kansas from The Wizard of Oz.

Lately, Bowling Green has had tornadoes in the sky, winds of almost 100 miles per hour lay ravage to the area, torrential rains flooding the streets and, for good measure, was one of the lucky areas affected by the recent power outage that stretched from Detroit to New York and up through Canada.

Of course, if Bowling Green represents Kansas then what about the mystical land of Oz? Our Oz is Hollywood of course; a land full of color and oddities that seem not of our humble world here in the Midwest. And what better people to greet us on our trip down the Yellow Brick Road than those politically incorrect Munchkins?

Naturally these are the Munchkins of celebrity also known as reality TV stars. These pseudo-celebrities looking for 15 minutes of fame not through hard work but by eating liquefied pigliver on Fear Factor or being pimped out by their parents on American Juniors. In fact, Munchkinland seems to be getting bigger with the number of reality programs growing exponentially.

In this Lollipop Guild of debauchery we have seen people shack up with staged drama, faking tears and awkward relationships.

On our way to meet the Wizard, we run into that lovable character that only needs a brain, the Hollywood executive. Only someone without a brain could have a hard time figuring out why all the movies this summer have not made the billions of dollars expected of them. Almost everything has failed to live up to expectations from

Terminator 3 to Hollywood Homicide, and of course Gigli, (I won’t rub salt in that wound…unless of course Ben and J. Lo decide to do another 20/20 interview).

Of course sometimes having a brain isn’t all it is cracked up to be.

Just look at “The Hulk” and “The Matrix: Reloaded.” I almost had a seizure trying to figure out the last 20 minutes of “The Matrix” (and why exactly they felt I needed to see Keanu Reeves’ ass) and “The Hulk” was so busy being serious they forgot to lighten the mood by adding, perhaps a joke or two. This summer has taught our poor scarecrow two things:

1. Sequels: Don’t mean that much when the first one is barely out on DVD and

2. When you have so many big movies coming out week after week ,everything will suffer because it is all being lost in the crowd.

Next we meet a woman sorely in need of courage. Hillary Clinton’s long-awaited memoir finally came out this summer. This was the biggest story in the book industry not involving Harry Potter or collectible editions of the Lord of the Rings novels with Orlando Bloom on the cover. The memoirs amounted to a tepid bestseller that failed to be even as interesting as the Star Report. Oh well, I’m sure that in 2008 this cowardly lioness will be ready to be queen of the forest.

Now we have run into the Wicked Witch of the West also known as Liza Minelli and her faithful flying monkey David Gest. Fortunately we were able to slip by them while they argued over their prenuptial agreement. Am I the only person who thought this was a match made in heaven?

Now it is time to talk about a horse of a different color. The most disturbing trend throughout the summer has been the passing of some of the most enduring stars of Hollywood. Already this year we have seen the passing of Buddy Hackett, Buddy Ebsen, Bob Hope, Gregory Hines, Robert Stack and Barry White just to name a few. Now a sick few of us, myself included, can make a couple bucks betting on who gets the longest ovation during the in memoriam segment during next year’s Oscars.

On that tasteless note I think it is time we return to Bowling Green, but Mr. Hope I think I’ll miss you most of all. Now let’s tap our heels and go back where there is no place like home.