A Miscalculation in GPA

After reading the article that “evaluated” President Bush, I felt the need to recalculate his GPA.

Foreign Affairs: President Bush has not “alienated” our allies, period. The allies of the United States are held closely as our greatest assets–for example, Tony Blair. Grade A. Saddam was a menace to the world. He not only killed thousands of his own people, but he also suppressed his people to make himself more powerful. As for the weapons of mass destruction, these weapons could fit in a building the size a garage. Now put that into perspective to the country of Iraq. Not so easy, is it?

Uniting our country: After 9/11 the nation was one, there were no Democrats or Republicans. Grade A. The country is now torn in two because of the revolting practices of the Liberals. Their constant attacks on the Conservatives are truly mind-boggling. Are we not allowed to support our President? Is this not a country of free speech? Then why must the republicans hide all paraphernalia that marks them as such? They have to because of the protesting Liberals on the streets. They jeer, scream, curse, blow whistles, and God only knows what else in the faces of anyone who is a Republican. This is unacceptable; if the country is divided it is definitely because of the Liberals and their attacks. Senator Zell Miller (D), of Georgia said it best at the RNC, “Today, at the same time young Americans are dying in the sands of Iraq and the mountains of Afghanistan, our nation is being torn apart and made weaker because of the Democrats’ manic obsession to bring down our commander in chief.”

Fiscal Responsibility: Yes, President Bush has spent a large amount of money. I do not dispute that. However, this money was spent to keep the terrorists out of our country. Would it be better for the budget if airplanes crashed into the Golden Gate Bridge or the Statue of Liberty? The money was obviously well-spent. I feel safe in this country. Grade A. Should Democrat John Kerry be elected (God help us all if he is) he has promised to spend over 1 trillion dollars. I haven’t had much math, just AP calculus, but I think that the deficit would grow with another trillion spent rather than shrink.

Education: President Bush’s No Child Left Behind Act is showing results. Children are finally getting a better education because of better funding. Grade A. John Kerry’s solution is to add 500,000 new teachers. Here is the problem: Where is he going to put them? There isn’t room in the schools to add 500,000 new positions. This is a truly pointless and unfeasible solution.

The Economy: I am tired of people saying that the economy is bad. The tax cuts are getting people out into stores, getting home improvements made, and getting new vehicles. The more money that people spend, the more money comes back to the government in sales tax. Grade B. There is always room for improvement, however, go to Franklin Park. Is there ever a lack of people shopping? No. John Kerry’s plan to raise taxes would really boost the economy. Right …

Finally, a category that was most likely left out for a reason. Honesty: President Bush has stood by all of his decisions, popular or not. He does not waver based on how much people approve or disapprove. Grade A+. John Kerry has not stood strong on a single issue. His autobiography (now ironically out of print) has been selling for around 1,000 dollars on EBay because it is a complete contradiction to everything that he says now. So he has three purple hearts huh? Let’s see them, or are they gone? Even the people who served with him say that he is not honest or fit to command. That is a bad sign.

Well, let’s do the math. That gives President Bush a 3.625. Wow, he made the dean’s list after all. Kerry’s GPA, however, is not looking so good now. Well it appears that President Bush is doing a fine job so I must say this: Four More Years. Let’s keep a good thing going with W ’04 on November 2. To see the waffle syndrome, go to http://www.kerryoniraq.com.