Looking around, there are so many smiling faces, so many people that seem to have no worries or fears.
And even in conversations I have, I find myself taking my own problems and struggles and covering them up so it appears that I have my life together when in fact, I’m far from it.
The putting on of these façades is so common. And why is that?
It is common knowledge that this world is full of imperfect people, yet we try so hard to appear like we are simply on our way to perfection.
The problem expands because of its commonality. We compare ourselves and believe the façade those around us put on. It’s a cycle that does not end.
Oftentimes, the reality and pain of our lives isn’t remembered until solitude comes. Solitude scares us, so we play music or watch TV to drown out the loudness that solitude brings.
Solitude, being alone with thoughts, allows inadequacy to sink in. Solitude and silence allow the things in our lives that we are most unhappy about to be noticed.
This type of clarity is unattractive because we are sold this lie that living a truly satisfying life involves reaching a place where everything is “great.”
Our job is going well, we have great friends and little strife, we have found a romantic companion that fits every qualification on our list and we’re healthy and attractive.
The movies we watch, the music we listen to and even the people we admire point us towards this. Pain and sorrow is bad; ease and happy feelings are good.
And because pain and sorrow and hard times are inevitable, they come and with them bring discouragement and shame.
The fake smiles get painted on and we flip the switch on our pre-recorded laughter. The path toward the happy ending is shared by all, although I think the “happy ending” is simply learning to be a greater pretender.
Once we reach and obtain the ingredients, we realize we don’t have the feelings we were supposed to have, and the change that was supposed to come doesn’t.
We remain the same, with the yearning for something greater, and no noise or artificial act can fully drown that out. Maybe for a day or a week, but not for a lifetime.
It is not until we find the thing that truly make us whole that we can stop pretending and start living. Not free from flaws and hard times, but accepting of them.
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