One tablespoon of liquid doesn’t seem like a large amount unless you’re talking about semen and it’s in your mouth.

I have no problem with blow jobs, aka fellatio, but I’ve experienced swallowing, spitting, being warned to get out of the way and of course using the act as foreplay only.

Spitting and swallowing are my least favorite ways to end a session of oral sex. I either want to watch my partner climax or I want to get down to some more interesting fun where I get to a happy place, too.

Regardless, the act of what to do with ejaculate, or even whether to participate in oral sex at all, is a personal decision.

I chose to focus on blow jobs because I’m very biased when it comes to receiving oral sex, cunnilingus, and if I try and talk about it too long, I’ll never get my column finished and my husband won’t get to study for his test, so let’s just say I’m all for it and move on.

I spent nearly an hour discussing the subject of blow jobs with three freshmen, one homosexual male and two heterosexual females, to see how they felt about it.

Kevin Pence enjoys giving and receiving blow jobs because of the amount of intimacy involved.

“I think it’s more of a turn on for me because you have complete control of the person’s body,” Pence said.

Sara McGuire has the opposite impression.

“I just think it’s awkward. You’re using your mouth and you can’t see them,” McGuire said.

Both bring up good points. It’s difficult sometimes to maintain eye contact with a partner during oral sex, depending on the position, but sometimes that’s not as important as the reactions received.

For me, hearing my husband react is just as sensual as seeing his face, but people who prefer eye to eye contact may want to experiment with various positions if oral sex is part of their relationship.

It doesn’t have to be, however.

Emma Boyers has no intention of engaging in the practice unless she’s met the person she wants to be with, and even then there is some hesitation.

“I think if you’re in a relationship with someone and you discuss it, it’s fine, but people take it too lightly,” Boyers said.

Pence, who has a Facebook page, agrees with that to an extent because of the Facebook option of ‘Hooking Up’ when you choose why you’re friends with someone, but doesn’t think a blow job has to be present for a relationship to be good.

“I don’t really care either way. Plus I think it’s better if you really like the person because it’s more than the physical. It’s the emotional, too,” Pence said.

McGuire takes a more logical stance on why she doesn’t see the necessity of blow jobs.

“You’re going to be swiping the germs anyway so you might as well go for the home run,” McGuire said.

Nobody can accuse McGuire of not speaking her mind.

So how many germs should be swiped?

While my husband and I use the act as foreplay, there are many couples who take the act to completion.

What were the ideas regarding spitting or swallowing?

At this point, Boyers was speechless, no doubt because I traumatized the poor girl, but Pence was unfazed.

“I guess for some people, if you spit it out, it’s just a physical thing, like you don’t care,” Pence said.

He also points out he’s not one of those people, as the choice is a completely personal one and has no influence on whether a person likes you or not just based on whether or not they’ll swallow semen.

But McGuire takes a bit stronger position on the subject as her boldness asserts itself once more.

“I just think it’s gross. It tastes sick,” McGuire said.

Blunt and to the point. Who couldn’t admire that? So we discussed ways to remedy the taste issue.

There are certain foods that can be tried to see if there is a change in taste, but like body odor and breath, the taste of a man’s semen varies individually.

My husband drinks Coke and eats spicy food all the time and once I told him his semen was ‘spicy’ as well. He told a co-worker who proceeded to whisper “spicy food” when she walked by him.

I suppose I could say something about sharing too much information about our sex life at work, but who am I to talk?

I finally drew the line, worried I’d start getting chronic heartburn, and we enjoy oral sex more now as foreplay.

Besides watching the diet, the best thing a man can do is stay clean.

Seriously, they’re tucked into pants all day and with the walking, I’m thinking the groin area gets pretty warm. Cleanliness is a sure way to get a partner to not wrinkle their nose at the option of a blow job. That would kill the mood pretty quickly.

But make no mistake; oral sex does not need to be present for a good sexual relationship.

“I’m not going to do it just to do it,” Boyers said.

Boyers also points out she’s not going to be selfish, either.

“If I’m not going to give it then I’m not going to take it,” Boyers explains.

Pence agreed that a relationship can be sexually healthy without a blow job as part of the deal and doesn’t understand why some people think oral sex isn’t on the same level as vaginal or anal sex.

“It’s not safer by any means. I think too many people require it for a meaningful relationship,” Pence said.

In the end, all three agree there is too much pressure to engage in certain sexual acts and that everyone should be comfortable with the individual choices they make with their bodies.

Do not have oral sex if one partner isn’t excited by it. It can make the whole act seem strained and awkward. The physical pleasure will be enhanced if the person giving the blow job enjoys it as much as the person receiving it does.

And guys, don’t get all upset about the spit and swallow debate. It’s nothing personal regarding your partner’s feelings for you. You get to have an orgasm.

Just be happy with that and don’t forget to return the favor in some way or the only mouth you’ll have around you are the blow up ones.

Send comments, questions and ideas to Chandra Niklewski at [email protected].