One of the biggest pressures a young adult in college may feel is the need to couple up, the need to find a person to label as your own.

But, it’s either one extreme or the other.

I have friends who want nothing more than to be engaged once they graduate and then I also have friends who can barely see their future for the upcoming week, let alone marriage.

The thing is though, that I believe our generation and our culture is shifting and the cultural tradition of monogamy, marriage, chivalry and family planning are slowly becoming traditions of the past.

I really think this generation is becoming more cynical when it comes to the outlook on happily ever after.

I know that for my own personal experience, I find myself saying things like, “I know this probably won’t work out,” because a majority of the time it honestly doesn’t.

I just don’t see how me, at 19 years old, can meet someone right now who I could see myself with when I’m 50.

We are constantly changing – changing ideas, changing beliefs, [and] changing values.

That person you met and loved when you were 19 may not be that same person a year from now, or 20 years from now.

I’m realizing now though, that I am not alone, and many other members of my generation don’t see the point in the rush on commitment.

But why is that? Why all of the sudden is the idea of a monogamous partnership, a happy marriage, considered so taboo and so unrealistic?

Our media, our mainstream influences, may have something to do with it.

If you listen to any song on the radio, it tends to do with heartbreak, or casual sex.

Also, if you listen to most rap songs, most rappers preach that they won’t be tied down to one person.

Drake has literally said in one of his songs, “What’s the rush on commitment?”

We have reality stars, who have empires within our media.

Kim Kardashian and her scandalous relationship past or her sister Kourtney and her boyfriend [never to be husband] Scott Disick and lets not forget the failed marriage of Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom [I was totally rooting for them.]

Or maybe the members of the cast of The Real Housewives have something to do with it.

At least one housewife has been divorced within each cast.

My point is how could we not become more pessimistic, more reluctant to finding “the one”?

But I guess the bigger question is: “Is it a change for the better?”

I personally have mixed feelings about that question.

Part of me really feels like it is a change for the better; young adults aren’t jumping into serious relationships and soon-to-be marriages without living their lives for themselves first and that’s crucial.

When you’re young that’s the time to be selfish, to be thinking about you and what you need to do to better yourself and your future.

When you’re in a serious relationship at a young age, it can honestly skew that judgment, and you start to think more as an “us” instead of a “me.”

But then again, part of me wishes I wasn’t always so realistic, that I could be trusting enough and view that commitment as something more sacred instead of a hassle.

Because falling in love at a young age can be seriously amazing, but it’s a little sad that now instead of falling for someone with all of you, everyone tends to have one foot on the ground.

The loss of something’s desire and appeal for a gain in realism and knowledge is really bittersweet.