If ever I said to my best friend that I thought Facebook was single-handedly destroying our generation, he’d probably laugh at my face, and rightly so I suppose.
I’m probably more of an addict than your average millennial, and to be honest, even as I write this article, what’s the first tab open on my web browser? You guessed it.
As with many things in my life, I’m conflicted about it. On one hand, I’d be a massive hypocrite to hate it or look down upon those who use it not only because of how much I use it, but also because it makes many of the relationships I have with people in my life much easier [or simply possible in some cases].
However, on the other hand, as I spend endless hours perusing my news feed, I find myself growing increasingly annoyed and cynical as I watch so many digital lives unfold before me.
Maybe I just need to get a life, and maybe I really am the only one who feels this way and my inner misanthrope is even more active than my ADHD. Lately I’ve found myself thinking ‘No, I don’t care that you went to that Blake Shelton concert,’ ‘No, I don’t care about your unplanned pregnancy’ and ‘No, I don’t care that you got married and became dead to the world because it’s the last interesting thing you’ll ever do with your life.’ I began looking at what I was thinking and began to wonder where along the line I became so jaded, and maybe just downright mean.
But then, as I sat writing and listening to music [and yes, of course, using Facebook] the other day, it hit me in a sort of roundabout way. The problem with social media of any kind is that it’s become so pervasive in our daily lives that our Facebook pages, Twitter accounts and YouTube channels begin to take on an eerie sort of life of their own.
What I mean is that there’s John Smith, and then there’s John PardonMySwag Smith who only communicates in asinine hashtags and unintelligible faux-macho ramblings. John Smith might be a really cool person to talk to and hang out with; maybe he’d even be a good friend.
The other guy? Not so much. And how could you ever believe these two people were the same? Because
they aren’t.
The truth is, we all wear masks even in front of our closest friends and dearest family members, but social media doesn’t just make this okay, it’s all but an obligation in the digital world to create a life that’s really better than the one you’re living. The internet wants to see you smile, so you put up a façade — we all do.
We all indulge in posting an occasional selfie or a picture of a new car, or an endearingly cheesy photo of us kissing our significant other, but none of it is real, not in the true sense of
the word.
When I look at my friends through the lens of social media, I think I’m seeing clearly, but really, I’m just jumping down a very unassuming and well-camouflaged rabbit hole of forced smiles and hidden cries. What I’m judging aren’t my friends’ real lives, but just bits and pieces of them that make me and everyone else a more little insecure in the makeup of our own digital selves.
If I had gone to that Blake Shelton concert, who knows, maybe I would have enjoyed myself. If I had to deal with an unplanned pregnancy, the last thing I would want is condescending judgment from someone who’d never dealt with it, and if I had just gotten married, I wouldn’t care much at all if others were jealous of my happiness.
We can’t wish away social media now, and it’s important to remember that it can be used for good as well, but as our society grows increasingly impersonal and isolated, we must remember to be true to our true selves. Even if it makes us vulnerable, even if it makes us nervous, even if it loses us friends at the click of a mouse.
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